The Fish ‘n’ Chips

The fish ‘n’ chips amouldered, amouldered on the floor, 
Twas the fish ‘n’ chips that no-one wanted anymore, 
On its tail there grew dark green mould,
The colour of the money for which it was sold.

A duck waddled past and turned its beak 
Towards the spot where the fish had lain all week.
It sniffed the air, inhaled the fumes,
Unwittingly it sealed its doom. 

It toppled to the floor and breathed its last,
Before its eyes its life flashed past.
It let out a sigh, its very last breath
Before it met the one called Death.

But the fish ‘n’ chips amouldered, the same way as before;
Oblivious to the rotting duck which lay beside it on the floor.
So the fish ‘n’ chips amouldered for a day, a month, a year;
And whenever a duck waddled past that spot, it felt a twinge of fear.

Making Fun Of Atheists?

Q.Why did the atheist throw her watch out of the window?

Ans.She wanted to see if it was designed intelligently enough to evolve into a bird.

Q.What do you get when you cross a Jehovah’s Witness with an atheist?

Ans.Someone who knocks on your door for no apparent reason.

Q. Why did the atheist cross the road?

A. He thought there might be a street on the other side, but he wouldn’t believe it until he tested his hypothesis.

Q. How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb?

A. Two. One to actually change the bulb, and the other to videotape the job so fundamentalists won’t claim that god did it.

Q. How many atheists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A. It doesn’t matter. Atheists can’t see the light.

An atheist buys an ancient lamp at an auction, takes it home, and begins to polish it. Suddenly, a genie appears, and says, “I’ll grant you three wishes, Master.” The atheist says, “I wish I could believe in you.” The genie snaps his fingers, and suddenly the atheist believes in him. The atheist says, “Wow. I wish all atheists would believe this.” The genie snaps his fingers again, and suddenly atheists all over the world begin to believe in genies. “What about your third wish?” asks the genie. “Well,” says the atheist, “I wish for a billion dollars.” The genie snaps his fingers for a third time, but nothing happens. “What’s wrong?” asks the atheist. The genie shrugs and says, “Just because you believe in me, doesn’t necessarily mean that I really exist.”

In [today’s] church, we measure our success by the numbers of people who attend our church — and yes those numbers are important. Yet even more important than a packed church is the depth of Christ-centered unity between attending Christians. In the kingdom, as in poker, four of a kind beats a full house.

Francis Frangipane

24-7 Prayer introduces The Vision Course

24-7 Prayer introduces The Vision Course

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Reasons to read a Conservative Roman Catholic blog

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The Church of England’s 5 Year Plan

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Fresh Expressions